Breaking the habit of dating your past

Book Club
Free 8 week online course, to assist you to break free from the patterns of the past and to help uplift you to a new vision of the future.

We will cover the main themes in the book, one chapter per week, so you don't need to buy a copy of the book to join.

-See Events page to sign up

The journey to true love, is the journey to the love which lies within you.
You are the one that you have been seeking. A connection with your own inner true self, which is love.
Connect with that love and find, that peace and joy are your destiny and from there, can call forward - a new relationship, your life purpose, and move towards living your authentic life.

Chapter 3:
Dating the narcissist
You may find that things move fast when you date a narcissist. One minute you are single, the next you are entwined in his web of mental games.

Some favorites are: “I want you, but I don’t
want you”, “Let me tell you your faults”, or he can ignore you for days because you have “hurt him”.

He has a huge list of offenses, and at any random point in time, he can accuse you of one of them.

I have found a narcissist is insecure and afraid on the inside
and has a deep need to make you feel as bad as he does.

On the outside, he can be confident and highly intelligent.
He can be charming and win your friends over with his
charisma and outgoing personality. Shy versions exist also,
sitting alone at your family functions, separating you from
family and friends.

He loves listing your faults, but then will refer to you as his
princess, or that you should be treated like one.

You will wonder why he wants to date you, when all he can see are
faults within you. He needs to put you down. He cannot
have you receiving greater applause than him or outshining
him.

He needs you dependent on him, mentally and emotionally, otherwise he cannot play with you, knocking you off your happy perch when he wants to.

You can be happy, when it suits him. A common attack of his will be to tear you (or your future children) down, out of nowhere.

A sudden attack over nothing is his weapon of choice. He may then follow this up with the silent treatment, which can last for days. He loves
having you wonder what you have done wrong.

Mental and emotional torture is his delight, and depending
on the degree of narcissism, he will intersperse this with
periods of physical or sexual abuse.

I've found In its worst embodiment, this personality type can bring
you to the brink of destruction and despair. This personality type can undermine your self-esteem and cause you to question your relevance in this world.

The narcissistic personality details presented in this book are based on my life experience and observations, they are not presented as a medical diagnosis nor to diagnose or treat anyone.

This book is my offering to help you uplift your life, to let you know that you are not alone and assist you to uplift your life back to love, joy and peace.

The five signs and nine filtering patterns are your tools to assist you in breaking the habit of dating your past. Your old patterns no longer need to attract in your romantic partners.

We are all on a journey where teaching is constant and learning is optional. But for the seeker of truth, learning is imperative. The aim of this book is to help you evolve beyond your old patterns and attract in the romantic life partner you have been yearning for.

Discover the five easy signs to help you to know whether you are repeating the past. Eliminate the nine filtering patterns that you use to ignore the signs. These simple tools are yours to assist you to live your authentic life and propel you on your journey to true love.

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Meditation:
Forgiveness Exercise from the book: Breaking the Habit of Dating Your Past
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Connect with Me !

This Weeks Blog!

asking for help

It is easy to get caught up in life. Our world runs at such a fast pace. We can forget the simple things, like stopping to smell a flower and enjoying that simple moment.

Meditation and self care are also often left behind in our fast pasted world, as well as remembering, that we are not alone, and often help is just a question away.

Amber
Amber hated visiting her in-laws. They would criticise her her clothing choices, her cooking ability and her house’s cleanliness; giving her those looks, or just a quiet word here and there never loud enough for her husband to hear, but always letting her know she was not good enough for their son.

Amber and her husband argued constantly over visiting his parents. He saw only their good, and she their bad. Amber said she had an event to go to with her husband’s family and the thought of going filled her with dread.

I said to Amber, you cannot resolve this situation; your husband does not want to believe you. His family does not treat him that way. He doesn’t see that they are treating you different to him. I told her, her bitterness and anger were preventing a solution appearing.

We said a prayer: Please lift this from Amber; she cannot resolve it. Please send down your light and resolve this situation for everyone’s highest outcome.

I said to Amber, now go to this function filled with love for everyone in the room, and go there to be with your husband. The next day she phoned me:

“You would not believe what happened last night. My mother-in-law attacked and criticised me in front of my husband. He would never have believed it unless he saw it himself. After five years of marriage, feeling defeated by my in-laws, here it was resolved in less than 20 seconds. My husband told me he was sorry he had not believed me.”

The power of prayer, the calling in of the light to resolve your life and world situations has more power to change your life and the world around us than you realise.

I call on the light to lift this situation from me and resolve for everyone’s highest and best.

online dating

Are you sick of the online dating merry go round?
Does the universe appear to be putting road blocks in your way?

Then perhaps you need a break?

Britney
Britney met a guy online. He was wearing a cap with blond, curly hair wisping out from under the cap. A few days later, she looked through her dating list. There was a guy on it she didn't remember clicking like to...

She opened the chat history and clicked on the picture to enlarge it. "OMG" she thought, it was the guy in the hat! He added new photos revealing he now had a shaved head. He looked almost identical to her previous boyfriend.

She showed his picture to her girlfriend and she said, “He looks just like Rodger" Yes! She wasn’t imagining it! This was the third guy on this site who looked similar to one of her past boyfriends.

She decided the universe was giving her a sign. It was time to get off that dating site. She deleted her account and did not look back.

Please send me my ideal partner, in alignment with my divine timing and for my highest path forward.

Previous Blogs!

Ticking Boxes - The Danger Zone!

‘Ticking boxes’ is when you focus on the things that you have always wanted in a partner. Your ‘ticked boxes’ list might contain; that the person comes from a loving family, that they are financially secure, they exercise, eat healthy and so on. When you meet someone who matches with your list, it puts you on a high and you start focusing on where you match as a potential couple.

The problem arises when we start ticking boxes on those early dates - he has the right income, the right hobbies, the right friends, the right social standing, and all this “rightness” leads to dating "blindness" – repeating the past!

When your attention is focused on ticking boxes, you stop hearing his faults.

Save yourself time and pain by getting rid of the habit of ticking boxes. Those early dates are like a job interview – you are interviewing him to see whether he is worthy of being part of your life. You want to hear the deal breakers, and not miss them because you were too busy thinking
“OMG I've always wanted someone who…(fill in the blank)…!

#breakingthehabitofdatingyourpast #dating #relationships

what is preventing you from saying no!

As girls, we may have been taught in childhood:

To be nice
That if we are nice we are "good girls"
But, if we are not nice we are "bad girls"

Do you believe that you are a nice person?
Do you believe that your are a kind person?

You may believe that you are nice and do nice things, but you can also carry the conflicting belief, "I am not a Nice person" which causes you to fall victim to the inability to say no.

Carrying the belief, "I am not nice", causes you to say Yes when you want to say No. Every time you want to say no, your mind runs the filter "What if they think I'm not nice?" You then say yes when you want to say no.

As a consequence you spend your life "trying to be nice" never saying what you want.

I am Nice
Without the belief "I am kind", the Shadow side of "I am Nice" can appear, which has the ability to make the "Nice" person appear selfish.

I am Kind
Without the believe "I am Nice", the Kind person can struggle to say No. When wanting to say No the mind brings up the filter "I'm not Nice" and so the No turns into a Yes.

Both Nice and Kind
Where we want to be: To have both beliefs "I am Nice", "I am Kind", and so you have the ability to say what you want when you want without worrying whether someone things you are nice or not.

Downloads

Say Yes to receive the downloads from the list below that you would like:

I know what it feels like to be nice
I know how to when to discern to be nice
I am a nice person
I know what it feels like to be kind
I know and when to discern to be kind
I am a kind person
I know what it feels like to say No and still be a nice person

A Download is an exchange of energy, as you read the downloads, and say to yourself 'Yes', the energy of the download is being 'downloaded' into every cell of your body and every fibre of your being. If you are not familiar with the ThetaHealing® process, just say yes and allow the energy to come into you. If you wish to skip the download then say "No".

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